Getting In Shape And Finding Your Courage Doesn't Have to Hurt

Here's an idea worth sharing and my primary message to challenge us through battles within that threaten to burn down our spirits and relationships.

First, have you noticed how many people talk about shaping our lives? 

How many speakers have you heard that thank those for helping to shape their lives into confidently walking forward? 

We encourage people in all areas of life to "get in shape" in attitude, finances, physical body, and relationships.

Part of how we try to shape life is through trying to balance things between work and family life, self-care, and playtime.

Is this the shaping we want to continue, or is there something more inspiring to pace ourselves throughout life?

Let's become self-inspired to turn to the artists in the world. In art, balance means shape. Rarely do we feel pressure when observing a masterpiece. So, why not create a new picture for ourselves?

With so few of us operating as artists, we aren't open to redefining our relationship with balance that can be a soul-inspiring connection.

What if the way we balance life were to shape it in a way that doesn't require pressure? 

Next, we can appreciate the diamond analogy to life when describing ways to mold and create better versions of ourselves. 

Still, to turn a diamond into your desired shape, you must grind the edges. Think of all the grinding work we do in the world to shape ourselves. Are we okay with continuing to refine ourselves in this way?

Are we forever in motion with the idea that being able to withstand pressure like a diamond is the greatest way to become our next shiny version of solid nature and elegance? 

Again, while I can appreciate all the benefits of analogies and hassle-like habits that can create transformative movement in people, we are also not limited to hammering our way through life.

We are also disconnected from the fragility of life that can unfold, regardless of how "strong" we've shaped ourselves. Just as a diamond can be destroyed by fire, our spirits can go up in flames when we aren't prepared to adjust to permanent change.

Here's my lens on this topic:

It is in the burning moments of life when relationships dissolve and emotional suffocation emerges due to permanent disability that most people aren't prepared to move through strongly.

Telling others "stronger" is on the other side of survival is a missed opportunity in building the muscle of emotional strength through adversity.

We all know we are constantly unstable with life, whether we like it or not. Life is the uncertainty we face.  

We know we're all vulnerable to being burned by life in various ways. So, what do we do? We try to find the courage to push through.

A walk across hot coals at Tony Robbins' Turn Fear Into Power event is about helping people conquer their fears. It is a prime example of a literal underfire approach to courage that works to shape people's confidence.

On this journey, I'm talking about a Fueled By Fire within approach that works to:

1) exercise courage over the long-term

2) connectedly (vs. personally) helps us overcome internal battles repeatedly  

My brother survived as a physical burn victim when our family's home was destroyed by fire. The shaping of strength through his healing came through gentleness, not toughness. 

In my observation, his courage wasn't about mind over pain, but his gentle heart, compassion extended to his family through pain, and fierce patience in the face of external judgments.

What are these battles within I speak of? I refer to them in my book Persevere to Succeed: A Practical Guide to Ignite the Fire of Success Through Uncertainty as The Fiery Four Devils we know to be uncertainty, fear, self-doubt, and disappointment.  

These devils are the universal connection we share no matter our life story. And that's the easy connection to others we so often miss.

Walking over coals is a manufactured way to show courage. 

Standing amidst flames when your spouse springs on you a plea for divorce is a melting experience that requires not only the courage to move on but fierce, gentle compassion to withstand

Can we evolve beyond personal gain in courage to extend patience, gentleness, and compassion as our strength and way of shaping our relationships? 

Mind over matter is one form of success through threatening circumstances that could harm us. Heart-open commitment through hellish circumstances is a strength unlike any other. This pacing style and rhythm in the face of adversity replace how we typically try to shape our life beyond that which did not kill us.

We're used to telling others to shape up. We know that we are in control of shaping our lives and will go to great lengths to gain the courage to overcome fears. While walking over coals for courage can be effective, we are not limited to short-term victories.

Our idea of balance is often pressure-oriented and uninspiring. When we go about life like artists, we see that shaping our lives doesn't have to include grinding or hammering.

Imagine taking a fueled-by-fire-within approach to courage, confidence, and compassion instead of an under-fire aim to gain personal courage. We can, at last, evolve as gentle-aiming humans with fierce energy, perseverance, and patience backing us that benefits all.

Want to explore shaping your life in ways that will light you up? Contact me at [email protected]! I can't wait to hear what you're excited about.