How Do You Draw a Picture of Strength, Confidence, and Courage?

What song would you pick to describe how you came to be as strong, confident, or courageous as you are at this point in life?

I'll go first--My Way, by Frank Sinatra.

Doing it my way has sometimes been sparked out of blind, stubborn energy rising, eventually requiring me to consider ways beyond my thinking.

But, upon reflection, I was my most miserable self whenever I followed others' advice or visions about whom I might become, ignoring my internal voice.

In high school, based on something my guidance counselor said and the internal self-doubt and fear that followed, I went against a burning desire to pursue a dream to go to NYC to study acting and perform in professional theatre.

I had no dream of becoming famous--all I knew then was that I felt incredibly alive in that ensemble theatre experience and the magical way in which that process can move an audience to tears or laughter. I didn't just want a job acting; I wanted a challenging but thrilling, moving lifestyle--and the stage was what I knew could make that dream come true.

Nevertheless, I went against following my most alive path to pursue theatre when my guidance counselor called me into his office. He wasted no time telling me I was 'not smart enough' to be admitted to any college--even if I was in Honor's English. He said, "The only way to succeed is to go to college."

He didn't know or care that I imagined studying at a prestigious acting school. Still, the fear and self-doubt that set in pushed me into rebellious action to apply to a college and distracted me away from my Big Apple dreams. All to prove to him I could do it.

Weeks later, I practically threw the acceptance letter on his desk to 'prove' to him I'd done it--I was smart, and damn it, here was some proof I might one day be as successful as all my friends on track for college. If I'd been any younger, I might have stuck my tongue out at him!

In the short term, proving him wrong appeared and felt to be a strength. "You go, girl!" is the term I can imagine people said to me.

In reality, I was weak to go against myself and ended up a miserable mess at college.

I love to learn, but an hour-and-a-half lecture with a droning voice could not hold my attention. I put my best self into my writing classes, got involved in theatre and art projects, and met some good friends. And I found myself hanging at parties based on peer pressure, not because I was 'into it.' Most importantly, I was becoming a person I didn't like very much in an environment I wasn't likely to thrive.

I was done trying to fit in. I wanted to break out!

Back to my song pick by Frank Sinatra, My way...

With a good chunk of college life under my belt, I was nervous the day I decided to do things my way...to quit and pack my bags for NYC. I had to tell my parents; I didn't want to disappoint them. But I knew if I didn't do things my way, I'd only ever be living someone else's version of me or a version I'd created to prove something to others.

My parents supported me and my dream entirely--but I knew, even without their applause, I was ready to move on into scary, uncertain territory that didn't guarantee 'success' like an almighty college degree.

Doing it your way can be a scary thing. Admitting what lights you up is an open door for criticism if it goes against a traditional path or value.

Whether you're seventeen or seventy, rejection and judgment from the outside are risks when listening to that inner voice.

And I've found if you want fewer regrets in life, you must be willing to take some hits, as painful as they may be, and risk losing others instead of yourself.

Years later, although I followed my dream, I returned to college to finish a BS in psychology--in my way, because I wanted to and knew it would inform the work I developed by other means of learning over the years. Not because I thought I needed it or to fit into the societal standard of what makes someone successful. 

What's brought a picture of strength, confidence, and courage into my life? A choice to do it my way, not in rebellious energy against others or to prove something to someone else, but in harmonious authentic honor of the voice that lives inside me.

As you build your life and business this next season, there's plenty of others' advice about what you should or shouldn't be doing and what success is or isn't online or off. You'll hear things like, "Don't waste time trying to invent the wheel; follow my formula; it's worked for years!"

The problem with following someone else's formula is that we may inadvertently unfollow what's inside us. We might find ourselves doing the dance steps without movement or feeling. And later, we might wonder, "Why do I have all I could hope for and still feel miserable?"

I've found...
The most profound way to feel successful is to make moves that begin with your voice first. And whatever song you choose that best describes your strength, confidence, and courage to this point in life, be willing to sing it aloud, even if others turn a deaf ear. 

What's next?
A decision to let others decide where your life is going can prove miserable. A decision to do things your way can be both scary and exhilarating. However, this is a step toward deepening your peace of mind in any season of life and through any sign of trouble. For an energetic deep dive into moving forward, join my MasterPeace-of-Mind™ Program and an ensemble of people willing to do the courageous work that most people haven't discovered is the key to a happier, more successful life! Click link below.

https://bit.ly/MasterPeaceofMindwithAmyMcCann2023